.....

At last, our final exams for this semester is over. Kaso nga lang, I have to do my thesis for our Filipino project tomorrow. In addition to that, GOSH! I choose to take another exam for my Zoology, I wasn’t quite satisfied with my score that’s why. It just came into my mind just by now, still I can’t enjoy my weekends. Thought I could watch DVDs this weekend! Hmp! Anyway, I just hope that my grades in other subject were good..

ThE CoFfeE aDdiCt

it's already 2am in the morning, still i'm not yet sleeping.(hello?? isn't it obvious!you're typing on your Computer!)I can tell that the neurons of my brain is activated by the great amount of caffein that i just had ingest!I guess I had drank at least 10 cups of black coffee eversince 9pm last night. I had finished 1subject (reviewing, I mean) for the finals and right now, the connection here is VERY VERY VERYSLOWWWWWWWWW..... It's like an hour or so before a page is fully down loaded.. I wanna play Tantra on-line pa naman! Grrrrr.... This is one of my stressful holy week EVER in my entire life..I can't enjoy it, got lot of things to do, my PC is, i supposed, somehow broke, and i'm kinda nervous for the finals, i don't know, but thisis the second time that i really felt not quite ready for it, or maybe, WLA LANG AKONG GANANGMAG-ARAL...just like last term, i know, i did no good on my exams! well, i can't turn back the hands of time..nangyari na e!

still can't sleep, it's 2.30am na... i don't know wat to do now, the connection still remains slow.. my messenger cannot connect! i thought i can finish uploadingmy web yesterday, but, nah, i didn't ! i just hate it when i put up deadlines to myself and i can't finish 'em up on time!

Last Wednesday, My mom asked me to drive her to Magalang. The traffic was really terrible! Butanyways, I enjoyed driving, that was my longest drive, from San Fernando to Magalang. Kaso nga lang,I can't forget what happend to the lady who was hit by a counter-flowing tricyle. Kahit na Trike lang yun, kawawa yung nabundol! i saw what had happened... kasalanan ng Trike! One of the thingsthat I hate in our country streets are the IMPATIENT, HOT-TEMPERED, "SIGA" drivers of any kindof vehicles! Specifically the Tricycles! the lady was tagging along her 3-year old child and on herarms was a less than a year old baby.. Thank God, the children wasn't hurt much, lalo na yung baby..On the other hand, kawawa din' yung nanay, I saw her left leg na nanlupaypay.. It seems like it wasfractured.. very dreadful scenario! biruin mo ba naman, sa side na kotse nangyari. I didn't freakedout but my mom did.. (hay, mga babae talaga...) Well, i just hope that the lady is duin fine now.

3am na, still can't sleep! but my head hurts.. It's sleepy already but my eyes won't sleep.. Tita's arriving later along with my cousin Brandon from Malaysia.. I could remember his fatty bumm-bumm!just like mine!(laughs) They come back here once in awhile to check out on my lola.. I miss her too..

TaLe oF mY WeeKend FeVeR,,,

Well, it’s holy week na. May people realize the real essence of this season. I had a wonderful weekend, though very tired! Last Friday, a friend celebrated her debut. Earlier that morning, I had fever. My tonsils are swollen. I didn’t practiced for our P.E. day. Somehow I still managed to be there. Pareng Mike, thanks for fetching me. Angelli again, I’m sorry if I didn’t sang as like what I’ve promised. Anyway, I was chilling during the program, my lips were trembling because I felt really cold though I was wearing a long sleeves. After the debut, we went to Partyplace, drank a couple of bottle, played billiards, and watched the band with a couple of gorgeous vocalist. I felt better after that, then we finally went home. I guess I got into bed at almost 3 in the morning. Mom really waited for me. The next day, I still have my fever by the way, we had competition of the dance contest, luckily though I didn’t practiced the day before, we won! Many people were surprised when they saw me dancing (perhaps, they just don’t know I can dance too, all around ako noh!). I really didn’t enjoyed because of the fact that I really don’t like my partner, he isn’t supposed to be my partner anyway!!! But when I saw the crowd and the people cheering for us, well, I had the urged to give all I have, and somehow, it paid off. We won as I’ve said. Just one thing I hated that moment, we won and I haven’t seen the trophy TILL NOW!!!! Nor touched it! After that, I went home at about 2pm, and slept till 5pm, I was ought to go back to school for the culminating night of our college and we were supposed to meet at 5pm. Good thing she went to her dent and she was late too, kundi, it’s very embarrassing. Past 5pm, she rang me up and woke me, I took bath fast so that I would just be waiting for her at school, she ask me to wait for her to finish dressing up before I would leave the house, and it almost took an hour.(I ain’t complaining pero bakit matagal? I always wondered, lalo na mga girls na pkikay..) anyway, she called back at bout 6pm, I left home, and my friends, lei with ken, and IC with Mark, were already there waiting for us. But still she isn’t still there. For the next 30 minutes, I stood at the front gate waited for her, “nasa telabastagan na kami” , I felt excited seeing her and I know in myself that I never felt as excited as like that, the last person made feel like that is K, KP I mean since they’re both K. I waited and just our of the blue, WOW!! The wait was worth it! I was mesmerized with her! The first thing she told me was “pasensya na” and the only word came out of me, was “ok lang.” I almost said, “ok lang, maganda ka naman!!”.. so there, we went in, me with her, mark with IC, and Lei with Ken. I can feel that my friends were kinda worried for me, for they know what I have gone through with my past. I admit, I still love her, and what I feel for that person I was with that night was just, well perhaps, infatuation. Still haven’t told her that I like her. The common factor about us is that we both went through the same painful experience, her boo left her for another gal in Manila and I was also left by mine but I don’t know why… but his ex still has connections with her. Anyway, I just like her, I don’t love her okei?? That’s what I always wanted to make clear.. the next few hours, we enjoyed our dinner, the band and by about quarter to 11, we both went out, and dropped by the coffee shop nearby the university because I promised her to take out for coffee before her Kuya fetches her. As usual, we talked bout our ex.. she even asked me to keep the coffee tissue for remembrance. and then when her kuya arrived, hinatid ko siya. And I went back inside the campus, the party was almost over, then as usual, before I went home, I guess that was bout 12midnight, I enjoyed a quiet walk from the church to the 7-11 store nearby, grab a bottle of water, and I simply felt happy.. then I went to the open internet shop, surf for bout an hour, then I went home, as usual, 2am! And I still have my fever.. but I’m happy inside, I know…

IF I KNEW

If I knew it would be the last time,
That I’d see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly
And pray the Lord, your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time
That I see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss
And call you back for more.

If I knew it would be the last time,
I’d hear you voice lifted up in praise,
I would capture each action and word.
So I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time
I would be there to share your day,
Well’ I’m sure you’ll have so many more,
So I can let this one slip away.

I’ll love you for always,
And I mean it from my heart,
Deeply into you I fell,
But when you we’re gone my heart fell apart.

But if it’s too late for us,
Around you, I’ll always be,
Always with you, my heart and mind,
‘till the end of my life I’ll find.

it hurts like hell

OVER AND OVER

Chorus

'Cuz its all in my head

I think about it

Over and over again

And I can't keep picturin' you with him

And it hurts so badYeah

'Cuz its all in my head

I think about it over and over again

I replay it over and over again

And I can't take it and I can't shake it no...

Verse 1I cant wait to see you

Wanna see if you still got that look in your eye

That one you had for me be-fore we said our goodbyes

And its shame

That we gotta spend our time being mad about the same things(Over and over again)

About the same things (Over and over again)

Oh, but I think shes leaving, oh man, shes leavingI dont know what else to do,

I cant go on not loving you

Verse 2I remember that day you left

I remember the last breath you took right in front of me

When you said that you would leave

I was too damn stuborn to try to stop you or say anything

But I see it clearly now

And this choice that I made keeps playin' in my head

Over and over again, playin in my head, over and over again

Oh I think shes leavin, oh man, shes leaving...

I dont know what else to do,I cant go on not loving you

Now that I realize that I'm goin downFrom all this pain you've put me through

Everytime I close my eyes

I lock it down... I cant go on not loving you

s h o u t

shout....

that's what i really wanted to now... for about 2 days now, my sleepin hours isn't satisfied... in addition to that, I've got so many things to do.. the thesis in my filipino subj, the oral defend for the Philo.. the research in my zoology subject... not to mention my fraustration for the student council. I really ought to run for the upcoming election, but just because of a meeting that i had missed, i lost it.. I was planning to run independently but there's no enough time.. anyway, on the other hand, there's still 3years to go.. there'll always be nexttime... Right now, i really am tired and all i can think of is just my bed.. i badly miss my bed....

Oral Defend..

1. Philosophy as “love of wisdom” is a lifelong search for truth, an abstract transcendent truth which encompasses the human person and his fellow-seekers. Hence, the search for truth is (a) both personal and at the same time, communal and (b) an experience of the tension between a sense of knowledge and sense of ignorance.

2. One way of looking at the practical value of philosophy is to see the relevance of philosophy to the individual in terms of justice. To understand such a conception is to appreciate the affinity of philosophy and justice in two interrelated movements: (a) to do justice requires philosophizing and (b) to philosophize necessitates becoming just.

3. A brief survey on the history of western philosophy reveals how a prevailing comprehensive doctrine affects the course of world history and vice versa. The gradual shifts from one era to another showcase man's innate desire and continuous search to have a fuller, more meaningful existence.

4. Existentialism, as a philosophical movement or tendency in the 19th and 20th century highlights the despairing mood of human existence. It emphasizes man as the giver or discover of meaning to his own life and to the world by stressing human subjectivity, man's existence, authenticity, human freedom and responsibility as it peddles the post-modern belief, existence precedes essence.

5. Phenomenology is a way of seeing, of grasping the world from man's lived experience and as a method, makes use of epoche, and the phenomenological transcendental reductions to describe man's experience.

6a. The human being is a mystery, which must be learned slowly, lovingly, with pain and tenderness, and which is never learned completely.

6b. At first glance, freedom and responsibility mean the capacity to choose, to act on my own, to be the source of my concrete actions and to be accountable for them. But man, as he gradually unfolds in the world, "is" not only free, he "becomes" free and "response-able". Freedom then develops into "self-possession within an objectively directed project in life."

7. Man's being-in-the-world is not a bodily life alone nor a spiritual life alone. It is a life of an embodied spirit (etre incarnee).

8. Human labor is a human activity rooted in man's nature as a "species-being." Work is not simply “a means to a goal outside.” Rather, it is a "value" in itself for it is through work that man realizes his true humanity. Hence, the human person does not only “work in order to live” but “man lives in order to work.”

9. Love is an activity of giving, the disinterested giving of self to the other whereby I enhance the other's unique value and in so doing enrich my own. Thus, love of the other as other does not counter to self-love but presupposes it.

10. Man is a being-towards-death, and in death man comes to grip with his wholeness and brings to completion the commitment of his whole self to the whole of reality.

BumPy Road

The road to success is not straight.

There is a curve called FAILURE,

A loop called CONFUSION,

Speed bumps called FRIENDS,

Red lights called ENEMIES,

Caution lights called FAMILY.

You will have flats called JOBS,

But if you spare called DETERMINATION,

An engine called PERSEVERANCE,

Insurance called FAITH,

And a driver called GOD,

You will surely make it to a place called SUCCESS.

???

IT's CF time, and here i am,

Putting into words what i feel,

Trying my best to explain what it is,

I din't know if I'm just dreaming or is it for real?

I like you and I know this is true,

Like now, you just smiled at me and you chase away my blue,

you're About just 5 seats away from me,

But it seems as if you're just near me.

Maybe you don't know what I really feel,

Even I don't know if this is real,

You caught me for more than20times looking at you,

I just wish, that somehow, you even have a clue...

"im happy that you told me you dremt of me last night..."

pHiLO sCHEdS

9-Mar-05
9:00-9:10 Salas, Sheena Marice S.
9:10-9:20 Ong, Manuel Louie P.
9:20-9:30 Velarde, Mary Jane D.
9:30-9:40 Navanale, Laxman Edelmar T.
9:40-9:50 De Leon, Mar Joseph B.
9:50-10:00 Loredo, Ma. Bianca Cecilia T.
2:00-2:10 Alejandro, Kristine Cecille C.
2:10-2:20 Viloria, Ariane M.
2:20-2:30 Pamintuan, Darren A.
2:30-2:40 Castro, Jerone P.
2:40-2:50 Dinjotian, Bianca M.
2:50-3:00 Austria, Christian C.

11-Mar-05
9:00-9:10 Lansangan, Paula Jessica B.
9:10-9:20 Lintag, Karen C.
9:20-9:30 Gumabon, Ferlyn G.
9:30-9:40 Deang, Mamahalin S.
9:40-9:50 Dizon, Brandon S.
9:50-10:00 Rivera, Ryan Lorenzo Y.

12-Mar-05
9:00-9:10 Peralta, Keno Rion R.
9:10-9:20 Tagle, Francesca Marie F.
9:20-9:30 Ramos, Joanna Lynn B.
9:30-9:40 Cayanan, Raiza L.
9:40-9:50 Gomez, Jennifer R.
9:50-10:00 Robles, Arnelyn D.

14-Mar-05
9:00-9:10 Calingasan, Angelli M.
9:10-9:20 Audea, Niña Welsie B.
9:20-9:30 Sarmiento, Julienne T.
9:30-9:40 Mendoza, Jean Rose G.
9:40-9:50 Almendral, Kenard C.
9:50-10:00 Magat, Krystle G.

16-Mar-05
9:00-9:10 Tiru, John Anthony S.
9:10-9:20 De Guzman, Honeywell D.
9:20-9:30 Maneja, Jinky V.
9:30-9:40 Fernando, Diana Trisha M.
9:40-9:50 Quiazon, Gracia Mia R.
9:50-10:00 Maganti, Arlou Anne Klein S.
2:00-2:10 Lacson, Jenina D.
2:10-2:20 Soledad, Camille Nicola L.
2:20-2:30 De Guzman, Rea B.

18-Mar-05
8:00-8:10 Reyes, Vincent Laurentte V.
8:10-8:20 Changcoco, Reanell M.
8:20-8:30 Pasion, Joel B.
8:30-8:40 Gaza, Maria Immaculada S.
8:40-8:50 Manalo, Ranilaine T.
8:50-9:00 Donato, Gaylord T.

buSy,,, BuSy,,,

I just finished making an outline for our thesis together with my assistant leader. Though I can go home now, still have to stay coz of my meeting for the upcoming Student Council elections. I have filed my candidacy yesterday and the elections will be on the 11th. (it's preety soon..) anyway, my opponent is also a co-officer in the first year level and a friend also.. Yesterday also, I had a nice time with a friend and I really enjoed being with her. We even went to the cafe where my ex and I used to hangout and to the Carmelite chapel. I read another posted bulletin from my ex that caused my disappointment...(nothing new..) that's the reason why i posted such words yesterday... It has really affected me, I'm not fully recovered, i'm havin' a hard time but i know, i should DEAL with it... I remembered our Counselor telling me that denial is not a good way of moving on... have to go now! ChoW!!!!

I'M JUST A HUMAN

I feel rage,
I feel Jelous!!!!
I felt like I was PLAYED!!!!
I feel... FOOLISH!!!!!