Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Summer dayz??

April is already ending near and I haven’t even soaked on a cool pool or felt the warm breeze along the shore which is really depressing cause even if I wanted to, I don’t have the leisure of time! This summer is one of the most stressful and depressing!

My parents are to come home by next week, a week before my regular duty so if we’re still to have vacation, it’d be not as long as I wanted it to be. I’m quite worried though that I’ll soon (and I’m certain I’ll be) scolded because of the cost of the repair of the car that I crashed last December but none the less, I certainly learned lesson from that. I learned not to drive when you are sleepy. Well basically, now I don’t drive because on the first place I still have no car, and besides, my license was lost!

Thesis. Thesis. And more of the THESIS.. Darn it’s really distressing. But anyhow, it’s a challenge that I’m more than willing to finish successfully! Starting from the letters, it’s hard to find the asignatories. You go to their offices early, then they’re not there and if its your lucky day that you happen to see them there when you visit their, still you’re not so lucky after all because you have to wait for 30min to an hour before you could get a PAGE (yeah, 1 page) communication letter addressed for the Chief Nurses of the participating hospital signed by the respective asignatories. How I wish there’d be offices that would just be in-charged of such job. The data collection part ain’t easy as well! Our study is challenged with the time frame because our subjects aren’t just ordinary patients that you would typically see in the hospital or the ward but most often than not, they’re hook on mechanical vents. Since last week, we were working on all the paper works but they just don’t seem to end! GRRRRRR… and up today, we were still having them signed. We were able to pass the letter to the Chief Nurse of one our participating hospital before the office hours closes only to find out that the subjects that we’re after are already six feet under (maybe not literally by this time because they just passed away 1-2day ago, BTW, there were 2 of them). I really was disappointed, anyway, may they rest in peace.. aside from that, last week, there was quite a turmoil within my groupmates. Good thing the fire calmed a little this week. (Hope there’d be a peaceful existence within us…)

It’s really also depressing that my ex’s gone. (Comment: Not again puhhleeezzz… stop talking bout that) Fine, I’ll stop.

I just wish, to get over and done with the thesis successfully and satisfactory, I also wish that somehow, I may be able to enjoy my parents vacation with us and I may not be scolded that bad by my parents for the car and all the expenses at home, and I may be able to unwind a lil bit, even JUST A LITTLE TINY BIT! (I beg the good gracious heavens) before I even go into an academic year expecting lot of work not only at home but also within my social groups… the council.. i’m wishing for a productive year ahead..

Whatever may come my way, if there is really no way that I’m to have vacation because of my priorities like the thesis and other stuff that are needed to be done, well, maybe I can just catch up after college.. wahhhhhh!!


So if you were able to savor your vacation
this summer despite of your work or studies, MAN!
Be thankful enough!! I’m going nuts over everything!



Saturday, April 21, 2007

final ado? is it?

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her gentle touch calmed my weary soul,


her voice was the sweetest music i ever heard,


her warmth gave me an assurance i'll never be alone,


her kisses kissed my life's hurt and troubles,



her love meant my life...


but i have no choice........


she left me no choice...


Tuesday, April 10, 2007

leadership rooted in one's self



Earlier in my life, I’ve always thought that leadership is only for those people who are popular and charismatic as to what the society used to reflect way back in elementary and high school days in which this stereotyping is also seen in our society at large. I thought of leaders as the sole Big Bosses who shall always be followed by everybody, whose words are never to be weaved and directions are always to be followed. So as I went on with life, I have always given this people with so much reverence and respect the way they deserve it.

Experiences have taught me that the stereotyping that I’ve always believed with for the longest time is not the whole truth about leadership and leaders but rather just a fraction of what I know it is about, some of which I have also proven myself wrong. True that leadership is a prestige that one receives one you had the chance to become a leader but what most people aren’t able to realize is that it also entails responsibilities that are most of the time; weigh far more than the prestige. I’ve also had the chance of meeting different kinds of leaders which would also include those who only takes all the prestige and not the responsibilities in which I can regard to as very immature and irresponsible but they gave me the strong sense to myself to be determined not to become like them.

Because of the irresponsibility of some of the leaders, be it governing a small group of people or a huge society, their constituents tends to lose their trust in them and the sad part is that the upcoming leaders are also affected, thus chaos arises. “Nobody’s perfect” as the cliché goes as it can be applied to every one but we humans, so as leaders, can correct them and learn from them to avoid them from occurring in the future. Taking the responsibility doesn’t only give me a challenge in this chapter of my life but also a chance to serve others. A heart for giving unceasing service to others especially to this who are in need is what I can be proud to say to the whole world that I have in me that (has been cultivated with dedication and commitment through years in my life) gives me the capability to take hold of the responsibility ahead. Nights before the campaign, I had been thinking what I could say to people when I would be facing a question regarding my qualifications to take the position if I ever won and having the previous stereotyping of leaders and low self-confidence in myself, I felt like drawing from the battle. I’m not scholastically inclined, not that popular among the crowd, I thought to myself I don’t deserved it and I even got to the brink of turning back but as I was to make up my mind to do so, I realized to myself that a true leader cannot only be measured by the number of people they know or by the academic awards they had or what other superficial things that most of people nowadays would be looking for in a leader but rather a leader can be measured with sense of responsibility, commitment and their willingness to offer themselves to others unselfishly. And as for me, the commitment and service that I wanted to give to others has given me the courage to go and carry on. So far so good, I was able to receive backstabbing and disputes even at the beginning of the election. At first I was hurt but I know that it’s also a part of the whole thing and I ‘m glad that instead of them making me feel low and discouraged, it further strengthened me to go on with my journey and I can steadfastly only promised them that I will prove them wrong by giving only the best in everything that I do so just bring it on!

One of the things I believe is that leadership is rooted in every being. We must always remember that we are all leaders in our own simple ways. You don’t need a crowd to govern or a prestigious title to be able to become one because the mere fact that one person is being able to lead himself is already a true leader in his own way.

Saturday, April 07, 2007

A Duty to Warn

I know "Duty to warn" is a term for a nurse's responsibility to warn other personnel in the psychiatric ward of the harm that a patient could possibly inflict to them..


Nweiz, I used the same term because i had this particular experience earlier this week that i was just able to confirm today that it was a scam..

Yes, a scam.. i was scammed with a quite huge amount by someone i don't really know.. I was doing transactions via internet before this experience even happened. like i was able to buy stuff like BNEW Usb for my couz and even a new printer scanner through the internet without any scamming or watsoever..

I don't intend to discourage you from making transactions via the net but i just wanna alarm you guyz to watch out for scammers and be sure that the sellers isn't one of them.. Even i couldn't believe that ppol really would do this nowadays because i believe that ppol are trustworthy, but i was proved wrong. I admit also that because of my carelessness that i didn't scrutinize the intentions of the seller, though there had been warnings and signs that i ignored because i easily trust other ppol, none of this could have happened.

what hurts is the fact that money is something i really earned for months. Then i was able to buy my PDA but changed my mind to buy another one only to have the money taken away by a scammer..

Anyway, this can be charged to experience. that's why you are also reading this post because i have a gut feeling that i should warn other ppol before something like this also happen.

I'm still thankful though that its not as big as the one scammed from my old folks that it came to the point that a property of our family was sold. (but still the amount was huge, less than 10k, really earned it for months...)

TOO MUCH OF EVERYTHING IS NOT GOOD..

AND That's the problem, i trusted too much...

Thank you for taking time to read.. Hope you gained something from my experience..

Advance Happy Easter!